Jun 07 2009
Short Note #101 (What Do you Regret?)
A few days ago, someone asked me “If you can, what could you change about your past?” I replied “nothing, absolutely nothing because what I did formed my actual self, and I have nothing to regret off”, but there was something that probably I would tell to my past self, “learn to value your intelligence and be more assertive”… probably that is the only thing I would changed, that I were more assertive with my decisions, but I don’t regret that part of the process of growing up, you learn a few things in the way and you learn from the mistakes. I wonder sometimes if maybe I was more comfortable with myself back then, maybe I would achieved better noted back in high school… probably not, I usually got bored a lot of the times back in High but I’m not going to say any specific reason, but at the end I learned from the experience and I promised to myself in the verge of my 17th birthday to be true to myself no matter what, because living to pretend, is not a way to have a pleasant living.
Maybe I regret about that, but I don’t complaint we grow as get older and ten years ago I never thought that I was going to be independent and living by myself in another country; 5 years ago my biggest worries were regarding college, 1 year ago my biggest worry was “how I am going to triumph here?” now I know much of the answers about what path I want in life and I guess right, this moment my biggest worry is “how I am going to do it?”; because at my age, age 25 I am starting over again, a new chapter in my life where my biggest dream still is journalism, but I’m starting from the scratch a year later because a year ago I was all by myself learning empirically all the new rules in my new territory; I feel ready again and capable of what I felt before moving, I feel 100% happy and now one year later I know what to do, and I really want to go back to college to continue my education in Journalism but first I’m going to get my G.E.D. in a few days.
At the end I don’t regret about anything, I am happy the way I am because all those experience, all those tears in the past made me stronger to affront the challenges of life and the challenges of independence, is not easy growing up (is something that nobody is really prepared completely) is something that not even your parents can tell about it because it’s an integral part of life. I don’t regret really, because it took me so many years to feel happy of who I am… life is just to live it and enjoy it at the fullest, not to feel qualms.
